Friday, 2 December 2011

December Thoughts

1. It's now just 3 weeks to Christmas. How did this happen? It feels like just the other day was Halloween. And just before that was summer. Is this an age thing?
2. After persistent pestering, I braved Tesco last Sunday afternoon with the 5 small people to purchase advent calendars. Who would have thought that 25 little pieces of Cadburys would cause this much excitement? (Helloooo-PMT calling!) To avoid confusion and subsequent war, names were stuck on each one and individual hiding places found. Despite fierce lobbying, they remained unopened til Thursday, when the chocolate shaped Christmas pudding was swiftly inhaled by all. There's ongoing feverish speculation about a numberless window on the calendars, and lively discussions as to when this one should be eaten. Yes...really.
3. Also on the Advent theme, I really want an Advent wreath but can't find them anywhere. And where on earth do you buy pink and purple candles anyway? If you can shine some light on this (sorry,sorry!) then please do share.
3. Overheard-
Cormac (age 7)- 'Doesn't Santa have 14 reindeer?'
Jude (age 10, speaking very knowledgably)- 'Oh no, Cormac, he's only got 9! Their names are Dasher, Blitzen.....etc.'
It's as though a certain 'There's no Santa ' conversation with Jude didn't happen last year and before you ask, he's not that good an actor. If he were acting, I would have been receiving knowing looks and big obvious panto winks.  I can only surmise that he's buried the memory of the chat entirely, or concluded that it was all a bad dream..
4. Artificial vs Real Trees- IMHO,  real trees are totally overrated , expensive and downright unpredictable. One year, we had a 16 foot tree in our hall- it took 3 days to decorate and we couldn't even reach the top to put the bloody star on. As for the pine needles? Don't get me started. Even getting the bugger in and out of the front door was just waaaaay too much hassle. Then last year, he brought home a baldy toilet brush excuse for a tree.... Costing 40 quid. We vajazzled it to the nth degree with lights and shiny decorations because although you can't polish a turd, you can sprinkle it with glitter and call it Christmas.And we did. So this year, I'm taking control and I'm on a mission to find a beautiful, full, green, botoxed creation, preferably with built in lights, possibly with fake snow. I'll let you know how I get on.
5. Staying with the tree theme, call me old fashioned but I'm just not a fan of November erections (sorry- couldn't resist!). It's double figures in December before the tree goes up around here, and it stays there till 6 January or until my excess needle alarm is triggered- whichever comes first.
6. Gingerbread latte from Starbucks (skinny milk, fat cream-they cancel each other out)  -When did this become an essential part of Christmas for me?  Haven't had one this year yet, but putting that right this weekend.
7. Out with the old, in with the new- pre-Christmas preparations for me include an annual toy room clear out,  and although it's a dreaded day long job, the shelves and the soul are cleansed when it's done. This year, I cunningly planned it on the day of the Strike, so several resident strikers crossed the picket line to help me fill the bin bags.
8. The beautifully innocent logic of a five year old Rory as he artfully delivers a crushing body blow of guilt, and instantly guarantees the top spot on my Christmas to-do list.
'Mummy, last year I asked Santa for a radio controlled aeroplane, but he brought me a radio controlled car instead. This year, I think I'm going to ask him for a car and maybe he might bring me my plane.' Ouch!
 9. Finally, it's Friday, it's December, it's wine o'clock. Make mine a mulled.....


  1. Great stuff Em. Real trees are a no-no in our house since Christmas 2008 when our tree dried out and collapsed on 23rd Dec and I had to hunt down the last fake one in Northern Ireland (slight exaggeration). Redecorating a tree at that late stage was not one bit funny. So fake all the way, that's what I say! (And the Starbucks toffee nut latte is the dogs wotsits....) Bronagh x

  2. You know - buying real trees is a thankless job. You trek around in the field looking at 'small' trees and trying to find one that is the 'right' shape, get fleeced by the farmer selling them, load the thing into the car (realizing it's actually not that small after all) and finally get it home and get dogs abuse for the next three weeks.

    However, I seem to remember that each year, despite comments all Christmas that it was too big, you always end up saying that it was actually lovely.

    It's a full 18' from floor to the top ceiling and I vote that this year we 'do the max'. The children are with me on this one !

  3. Damian

    There are plenty at Derryarnish 18ft high - I'll even lend you the chainsaw :-)

  4. I'm with Damian, it has to be a real one, what about that lovely pine smell??! Hate to show off but joe and the boys are heading up into the Santa Cruz mountains to cut one down this weekend. Poor joe it will be hard work sawing in ths sun!!

  5. At least Rory didn't draw a picture to counsel himself through the trauma of Santa messing up! For those of you unfamiliar with this story, the kids and I went for coffee in Emma's one day and the lovely gentle Rory presented me with a picture he had drawn for me. I was initially delighted until I looked closer and he said 'it's Colm (my hot tempered son) hitting me at school' big doe eyes, the works, I am still not over it!

  6. Bronagh- thanks for the back up- it seems like I'm out numbered in regards to the artificial vs real tree debate. Anonymous ( I know it's you C!) thanks but no thanks re the 18 foot tree! Jen- nobody likes a show off- Santa Cruz mountains- humpf! Jealous! Oh gosh- and i remember Rory doing that- I wanted the ground to swallow me up- poor Colm, squealed on by a picture!

  7. False tree last year cos it looked brill and was cheaper than any real tree. Had the right amount of 'arms' and sat beautifully. Don't do coffee but need a mulled wine soon. I have a wee gold tree too and a small silver one for kitchen and girls room. Anyhow, hope Santa good to you all. Bxx

  8. The list ... oh the dreaded list.
    who ever invented the stanta's christmas list of I WANT THIS ... needs to be shot.
    Our dog even has one this years..rolls eyes...

  9. Anyone that says 'you can't polish a turd but you can sprinkle it with glitter' and talks about 'November erections' must be a true kindred spirit ;)

    I somehow managed to have 5 trees last year (none of them real).

  10. I reckon you should go a bit AC/DC Emma, satisfy the male instinct in D with the "real thing" and go a wee perfectly formed fake for your sumptuous landing area... Dilemma sorted, though double decorating! LOVE the turd line!! And I'm ever so impressed with the Boyles! Xx

  11. Brenda- loving the gold and silver themes- off to Dobbies for a poke around tomorrow. Ida- one more reason not to get a dog- couldn't even contemplate a Christmas list for the bloody dog as well. Sarah Mac- 5 trees!!! Christmas tree Peer pressure- whatever next!? Nadine love, it might come to that yet ........